Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Ring around the maypole

Ribbons, ribbons, we all fall down!

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

I believed him when he said it wasn't a date-type thing

Monday, May 29, 2006

Beg your pardon?

I'm sorry I can't hear you over the sound of rotten eggs splattering against me.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

I styled my hair to match my broomstick

Friday, May 26, 2006

Plan B

When all else fails, bring out the overly toned legs.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

And what do we think of the colour?

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

I forgot where I live, can I come home with you?

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Country music just got a whole lot bigger

Monday, May 22, 2006

Rene's choice

Remember you only get to have sex with one of us, and it ain't me.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Don't be silly, babies can't pick up bad fashion habits at this age

Saturday, May 20, 2006

No I can't remember the last time I washed myself

Friday, May 19, 2006

Oh I think I'll just sit here and keep my excitement hidden

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Under the influence

When you are Paula Abdul, walking a straight line down Hollywood Boulevard is much harder than it looks

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Now I know what being Katie Holmes feels like

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Because golf clubs are more faithful than guitars

Monday, May 15, 2006

How to walk sexy and look unnatural doing it

Friday, May 05, 2006

Planning the great escape

Quick, while Susan isn't looking. Sweep me off my feet and carry me away!

Thursday, May 04, 2006

In search of a happy ending

I don't understand this game golf. It seems like a good wank spoiled.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

This concert smells of old people

Oh yeah baby, let's take this thing up a notch and...Zzzzzzzz

Nurse! I'm gonna need some flatulence deodoriser over here NOW!

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Formal etiquette

At formal events, the correct placement of the tableware is crucial to avoiding embarrassment.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Not one to rest on her laurels

Next time she would stay on the mechanical horse until all of the sequins fell off.